whenever i give advice to someone i say ‘idk’ like 5 times a sentence because i’m so afraid they’ll follow my advice and ruin their life so yeah i can never seem to sure
im weak truly
i hate when people think youre lying just because you laugh
are we not going to talk about how his signature looks like a penis jizzing
i will always reblog this because its my most favorite thing ever.
lol his face is like ‘i have just been given a gift’
do you ever think about how weird sleeping is like your body just gets so sluggish it shuts down and you enter a state of unconsciousness where you have vague hallucinations and when you wake up you forget everything about it and a third of your life is wasted on it
those kids who were born so close to christmas that they get fucked over into a combo present
when u see the cute boy
"boy i’m in a great mood!"
"oh, please. you can’t REALLY be in a great mood. there are people out there who just got raises. people just got married. people are being reunited with their families right now. how dare you say you’re happy."
The equivalent of someone saying you can’t be sad because other people have it worse than you.
my sister just texted me out of nowhere “do you want some pizza rolls i accidentally made 80”